no solids just liquids. yup, im starting on my detox diet today. it's exciting, i guess..hahaz. gotta have lotsa discipline though, i have to try my utmost best resisting yummy yet unhealthy food. no carbs, it'll only add on excess meat around my tummy and thighs.
am i self-consicous? maybe? it's just that i would not wanna go out of shape. not trying to do it coz of anyone, im doing it for myself.
damn, logged onto mtvasiaawards.com to vote for my darlings. to my 'horror surprise'! that rossa woman (whoever she is) is leading.. damn, now peterpan is no2. this can't be.. that voting thingy had just spoilt my day.
im going to school later..woo-hoo. but won't be seeing him, sad. once i reach school, he's probably else where. masjid? yea, friday prayers. dammit i miss him. why am i so bloody stupid? stupid mT! stupid mT!
i no longer feel 'heavy-hearted' whenever i climb into bed. i guess, im able to set aside all this gary bullshit. but the hope still lingers. how can it not? damn i yearn just to have a quick glance of him. i can somehow remember the bus88 incident. i was estatic, yea, almost reached nirvana when i saw him sitting right there in that bloody 88 bus. but damn i was outside the bus, at the bus stop. he was IN the bus, IN his school uniform, looking invitingly HOT. actually was on my way to my school.. i only get look at him for a measly 5 secs before the bus drove away. i couldn't stop smiling all the way to school:) yea, even shared my over-brimming joy with pisang..hahaz
dammit u bastard, why? why don't you wanna contact me or something? yea, you're right, whatever for? you don't give a hoot about me? why should you even bother? but i just hurts so much to see an empty screen, no messages. you got other more important stuff to do, i understand. you have to pursue your own interests. but why the hell did you start it in the firts place? i guess you were just bored, right? why the hell must it be me? of all bloody people, why me? coz im desperate. and you know that. you know i'll definitely give a reply why did you do this dammit? you're just making it worse.. you didn't mean it..yea right.. you didn't know.. just messaging as friends i don't regard it that way, you were so nice, why were you nice? ouh,you're nice to everyone..it's just how you treat other people.. now you had simply abandoned me, right? damn, we're not even close? we share nothing similar, stay friends i don't think i wanna be friends, it's just too humiliating and hurtful.. ok, fine with me..
